How to make social media a positive experience?

Hi there!

As you probably know, we are getting ready for a huge life change and moving from sunny LA to a much smaller city and slower lifestyle in Bend, OR. I am so excited to share this new season of our life with you - both the good and the bad! If you had asked me at the start of this year, I would have told you we are going to be in California for the rest of our lives, but we have the itch to want to try something very different and we are fortunate enough to be able to act on our impulses to answer our big what ifs.

All of this life has truly been possible thanks to you, Boomer, hard work and some luck! When I was getting my PhD, I didn’t ever think this is where my life would be but here we are. I am on this rollercoaster and excited to see how this all plays out. All this to say, while spending hours researching nanotechnology, I didn’t think for a second, social media could be a career and much less, for me.

So today, we are diving a little bit into this world, both as a consumer and content creator! This has meant all the ups and downs that come with this and today I want to share steps I have taken, and I am in the process of taking, to help make this a positive experience.

I’ll be the first to tell you social media can be both a wonderful and a dark place, I have experienced both ends of this spectrum! Of course, along with being a content creator, I am also a regular consumer of content so I have really had to try to make this positive so I can keep doing my job!

Here are things as a user that have helped me:

• Find your intention on why you use it - to find/keep connections, to learn a skill, to find relatability with someone else in a similar stage in life, to take a break from life or whatever else it might be but make sure the content you consume fits this!

• Curate your feed : I truly believe that you are what you consume : food, books, thoughts and content. Find content that boosts you positively, inspires you and motivates you - leaving you feeling better (ideally) or at least the same as when you found it. Often I find myself not enjoying content I used to and it just means I am in a new phase of my life where the content doesn’t serve me so I unfollow / mute as needed.

• Establish boundaries : When it comes to protecting your peace and mental health, establishing boundaries is so important - not only does this mean curating your feed, but also setting time restrictions, app feature restrictions, time you spend scrolling, apps you use, phones off during dinner etc. to establish this.

• Wake up + Power down routine : I have mentioned this in a few different newsletters now but what you do when you first wake up and before bed has a HUGE impact in our mood and stress levels. Not using my phone, especially social media, at least 30 mins after waking and not using any electronics 1h before sleep has both helped drastically improve my sleep quality but my overall emotional stress response through the day.

• Take breaks as often as you need them : It’s totally ok to take breaks when social media feels like it’s too much, deleting the app or using app restrictions can be so healthy and beneficial!

• Do not get sucked into battles with keyboard warriors. It never leads to a fruitful conversation and all it will do is end up making you more stressed!

• Social media can be a great place to form genuine and authentic connections. I have made several in person connections through social media that has led to wonderful friendships!

If you share any type of content then here are some ways to make this a positive experience for you :

• Not everything is content. It’s ok to just enjoy moments in life that don’t have to be documented and/or shared.

• Use social media as a way to express yourself without using it as a way to seek external validation. The numbers only mean so much, but at the end of the day, it’s how you really feel.

• Create content that is fulfilling for you, not what the algorithm favors. The dream of a content creator is for these two to merge but it’s not often the case as you go through phases and transitions. For me, it’s been a long and tough process to break away from what I started sharing on social media to what I really want to share and there are still some days I struggle with this.

• Don’t put yourself (or your dog) in uncomfortable situations just for what the optics may be!

• Remind yourself that you are enough, the way you are and showing up as your true self is the best thing you can do. I used to struggle a lot with showing up if I didn’t have make up on or if I was having bad skin etc but I am now recognizing the power in showing up as who I am in real life. We all want to see more of people like us living their lives, not extremely curated content that is “aspirational” but honestly just leaves me feeling bad about myself.

• Comparison is the thief of joy (unless you can use it to fuel you positively). I’m giving you a little insight into my BTS, but given my past history, I often feel less than and not good enough for things. Dan and I often have this discussion because I compare myself to other creators on social media. I am really trying hard to break out of the scarcity mindset - just because someone else has a certain type of success doesn’t mean I won’t. There’s enough room for all of us and it’ll all happen in time!

I hope these are helpful as a reminder for you as you start off your week with a little more care for how you are spending your time and the content you are consuming!

One easy/healthy recipe to try : 

BBQ salmon bites now that the weather is getting warmer!!!

One positive affirmation to remember : 

I am grateful for who I am and who I’m becoming

One thing I am actually obsessed with :

This has been by far the most popular thing I have shared on Instagram. I found the comfiest pants that also look good (and honestly feel like pajamas to me).

Boomer is excited for his summer in Bend! We are spending the last few days here packing, eating all our LA favorite foods and getting ready to bring you along on a brand new adventure. I wish you a great week ahead, together I know we can find more health and happiness! I hope you take some time today to do something to help you reset for the week - here are some ideas

With fluffy hugs, 

Charishma + Boomer (@life.with.a.landcloud)